• Dom Giddy

Preposterous Rhinoceros

It's preposterous, standing before me, holding a basket over his leathery arm..

Adorning a tuxedo jacket apon his top half, a tutu the lower..

Is a 4 foot 2 Rhinoceros..too friendly looking I surmise to do me any harm.


I'm aware I feel ropey, rough if you will

However, I didn't realise..

Endangered wildlife species hallucinations were on today's bill.


Absolutely preposterous I tell myself as he enters the room..

Here what can I get you bruv? He asks..

Followed by Brap Brap Boom!


It's going from preposterous to ridiculous as I take in the scene

A tuxedo tutu wearing short arsed Rhino

Who doesn't look very mean


For one thing, he has a basket, brimming with some sort of vegetation

When I enquire as to what it is

'Celastrus' he retorts, rolls his eyes..

Enquires of me..

Have you no education?


Why are you here? I ask

Becoming more than aware

Such a preposterous..

Rhinoceros situation

Doesn't really occur..


You rang the bell bruv..

Came the quick reply

That's why I'm here

Dressed in tuxedo..

Tutu and my favourite bow tie


Are you having a giraffe? I ask..

Becoming more confused..

The fact I'm talking to a tuxedo tutu wearing Rhinoceros

Leaves me really bemused


No bruv, he replied..no chortling here

The giraffes are on their day off..but

I can call down for the Deer..


The Deer? I enquire

Knowing now, I've really lost the plot

Yes Bruv he replied

Their on shift today, do you want them or not?


You're OK I stutter

Becoming ever more concerned

My head feels extremely hot I say

Have I been burned?


No came the soft voice..it was just an odd dream

An hallucination maybe, or something in-between?


Slowly I open my eyes

Focus through the dark light..

Lovingly mopping my brow

Is the Rhinoceros' wife!


©lyricallifebydg2022

Image Credit: Pinterest

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